Happy, Sad, and a Bit of Everything
by MoffAnimeTeeny
Summary: Kristin Aldersflugel, an average antisocial klutz, joins the Scouts to find her sense of purpose. Through the hardship, emotional strain, and depression of being in the military, she tries to find something that'll filter her emotions, whether it's a practical joke or the flash of a smile. (OC x Various. Rated T for language and themes)
1. Trainees

(No POV)

Kristin Aldersflugel, a 16 year old girl from the outskirts of the mountains, came to the military with one thing in mind - finding her sense of purpose.

There weren't many things Kristen did right. She was clumsy as a child, and very spacey. However, she planned to change that and prove to her village that she isn't as worthless as she seemed.

At first, she wanted to go to the city and run a general store. However, after one of the village boys left for the military academy, a lightbulb turned on in her brain. _The military... If I can fight and be of service to humanity, it'll prove that I'm not a lost cause! Yeah! I'm totally joining next year! And I'll be the best soldier I can be!_

 **Story Begins, Military Academy** (Kristin's POV)

"State your name, pig shit!"

"KRISTIN ALDERSFLUGEL. FROM EASTERN WALL ROSE, REPORTING FOR DUTY, SIR."  
"Quite a booming voice you have there, maggot. Why the hell are you here?"  
"Be-"  
"I SAID WHY THE HELL ARE YOU HERE. SPEAK UP, DAMN YOU."  
I cleared my throat and inhaled. "TO PROVE TO MYSELF, MY FAMILY, AND HUMANITY THAT IM NOT USELESS, SIR."  
Keith Shadis laughed maniacally. "I HAVE NO USE FOR SELFISH ASS HOLES LIKE YOU, PRISS PANTS. FACE RIGHT."  
I turned to what I thought was my right, however it was my left. "OTHER RIGHT, DIP SHIT!" "Guh- um, yes sir!" I spun back around, still holding my solute. Shadis continued down the line. I put my hands back behind my back and shuddered. _Dammit, woman, gather yourself. Can't be like this when I'm in battle..._ I thought.

I found myself staring at the back of a head of stringy blonde hair. Some really silky, shiny blonde hair. * _Damn. I wish my hair looked as good as that._ * In fact, the beauty of this persons hair left me unable to identify their gender.

 _Well, I've never seen a girl with hair that short, or a boy with hair that long... So... Um... Hmm. Ooh, I know, I can tell by their butt!_

I peered downward trying to not move my head in the process. I'd spent a lot of time studying boys' butts... I know a male gluteus when I see one. _Flat. Tight. Hmm... I'd say male. Holy shit. If his hair is this sexy I can't imagine what his face looks like._

Suddenly Shadis stopped screaming. I looked away from the butt to see what happened. He was staring at a girl with hair like mine, but taller, who was vigorously eating a potato.

"What are you doing?" he asked hoarsely.

No answer.

"You with the potato! JUST WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?"

The girl saluted, potato in hand, crumbs on her face, and bangs askew. "SASHA BRAUS, FROM SOUTH WALL ROSE, REPORTING FOR DUTY SIR."

"...A potato... Why would you eat it here?"

"Potatoes taste good when they are hot! So I prevented it from getting cold by providing it shelter in my stomach!"

 _This is the strangest thing I have ever seen in my life,_ I thought. _This is gonna be a fun three years._


	2. Three Years Later

Happy, Sad, and a Bit of Everything 2

**Three years after training**

After three years of hard work, its all paid off.

I am Pvt. Kristin Aldersflugel, 16, from the 104th Trainee Squad.

Just last week, I had made my decision of what regiment to join.

I didn't have the luxury of joining the MPs, since I was #30 in my class, so it was either the Survey Corps or the Garrison. I couldn't choose. However, days before the sign ups, I was in the trainee hall awaiting my ODMG to be inspected, and overheard Leonhart, Springer, and Arlert discussing their decisions.

And then after Kirstein having a mini fit and going off about joining the Survey Corps for whatever reason he doesn't know, I had some new thoughts.

Then Commander Erwin gave his speech on the goals of the Scouts, the mortality rates, the mission, and the sacrifices a Scouts member would have to make, I had decided.

I'd join the Survey Corps. The Wings of Freedom, Flugel der Freiheit. The glory and strength of humanity. Sort of.

I will not die with regrets. I have to live my life to the fullest. With two incidents with titans infiltrating the walls in five years, the time to fight back is now. I will be great, and for once it will be shown that the Aldersflugel family made a respectable person.

My mom is a regular housewife, my dad has no manners or dignity, and my sister is a floozy. I will be none of those things. I'm a SOLDIER. A SCOUT.

Its time for me to shine.

I may be surrounded by death, sorrow, famine, tears, and emotionally unstable people, but I have to do my job. And that is protect.

Maybe if I can save Arlert's butt in battle he'll finally notice how cool I really am and fall for me. Oh how nice that would be... Oh he's just so freaking adorable... What was I saying?

Oh yeah.

Its my duty as a soldier to protect my comrades as they would protect me. Hopefully.


	3. Evenings

Happy, Sad, and a Bit of Everything 3

**One regular evening**

I sat at my usual corner table in the dining hall. In front of me was my usual potato, bread roll, and mushroom soup. I liked to sit alone, mainly because I hate talking to people. Also, you can see the whole room from here.

I subconsciously stirred my soup with my spoon, resting my face in my left hand. One of the things I truly loved about dinner time was that I got to look at all the cute boys as I ate. It was the most entertaining thing I'd ever seen. Its like reading a drama novel but seeing it in motion.

From across the room I stared at Armin Arlert, the super adorable boy whose butt and hair had fascinated me since our very first day at the academy. I had a sheepish smile on my face, googly puppy eyes, and rosy cheeks from the sight of this beauty boy.

In the theater of my mind, a disturbing and highly unrealistic place, I pictured Armin wearing a cutesy little dress and an apron. I giggled internally.

 _*Ooh, Armin, you're so cute... Oh god, your beauty is gonna send me to the grave one day. I don't care that you're a whole year younger than me... One day I'll be Mrs. Armin Arlert... Maybe you should wear a dress and I'll wear a tuxedo... Oh my gosh, you'd look so cute. You and Eren are so cute together. Stop smiling, I'm gonna loose my cool. No. Now you're laughing. Ugh, my nose is seriously just gonna start gushing blood. God DAMMIT, your parents must've been some sexy people if they made you this SMOKING HOT. Ugh, please take off your shirt for training tomorrow. I'll pay you. I'll do your chores. You can have all my food for a year. Just strip, baby. Take it all off...*_

My fantasies were interrupted when I noticed Mikasa Bitch Face Ackerman glaring at me. I turned away from her to avoid her freaky unofficial staring contest. I silently ate my potato and directed my attention to the higher-ups all sitting together and chatting. _*They're so damn cool. Especially Levi. Hot damn. Him and Eren would look so hot as a couple.*_

I spent the remainder of dinner making up imaginary couples with the scouts.

Eren and Armin will always win.


	4. Cleaning

Household chores were never one of my strengths.

Back at home, I was forever doing my chores wrong and it blew my mother to another dimension. "Kristin, there's still sauce on these bowls you washed! Kristin, I see streak marks on the windows! Kristin, you forgot to feed the horses! Kristin, there's still dust on the floor! Are you half asleep or something?"

No, I wasn't half asleep. I just suck at house things.

Unfortunately for me, chores are something I'm always doing around here. Whether its sweeping the hallways, cleaning the kitchen, or doing the laundry, there's always something I did wrong.

Today was going to be the DEATH of me. I had the honor of cleaning... THE CAPTAIN'S BEDROOM.

 _Oh, for God's sake, why me? Why not someone who can do this stuff correctly, like Krista, or Petra, or Bertolt? The Captain is gonna chop my head off and throw me in a vat of acid. Maybe he'll chop my remains into little pieces and make a soup out of me. Maybe he'll kick the shit out of ME, like he did to Eren. Ooh, that would be hot. Hmm. No, no, no, I gotta do this correctly. Maybe if I get on his good side we can be friends. Yeah... Being friends means I can get closer to him and getting closer to him means we can have a thing! Oh yeah! Oh wait. He's still shorter than me. God freaking dammit ugh._

I trudged miserably to the cleaning supply closet and grabbed a broom, a duster, fresh bedding, and a bucket of water.

On my way to the Captain's room I passed Krista, who was humming a sweet tune as she merrily swept the hall. I would've asked her if she would trade jobs with me, but Ymir was with her and she scares the hell out of me.

I think they're dating. I don't know.

The captain's room looked immaculate as is. _Um, what am I supposed to clean? This room is like the cleanest thing on this Earth._

I thought back at all the things Captain Levi told me to do in here.

 _"Aldersflugel. " "Uh, yes sir?" "You clean my room today." "...Yes sir." "I'll tell you this once and only once. Change my sheets, those things smell like dust and crap. Sweep the floor and dust my book shelves, and the books on the shelves. Wash the windows, they're covered in bird shit. If I find a speck of dust anywhere, I'll kill you. And if you touch my things, with the exception of my books, I'll kill you. If you already dead because of proposition number one, I will see to it that a titan eats you." "Oh, Short Stack, aren't you being a little rough on Kristin? You should respect women more..." "Shut your face, Shit Glasses. I'd do it myself but I have a million shitloads of paperwork to do, because asshole Eyebrows King over there has a dumbass meeting. So leave me alone. Tell that woman to get me my tea in my office now. And also tell her to put vodka in it so I can pass out and not have listen to anyone today." "Really?" "No, asshole! I was kidding! Aldersflugel, why the hell are you still here listening to Hanji blab? Go!" "Yes sir!"_

I nervously began sweeping the floor. I proceeded to do everything the Captain told me to do. I left the room perhaps two hours later, just after I dusted the last shelf and took a peak in the Captain's under wear drawer. I had done everything perfectly. Or so I thought I had.

Later that evening when I was walking down to the dining hall, I passed Captain Levi. " Good evening, Ca-" I was cut off by a powerful kick to my stomach. I felt acid rush up to my mouth. I coughed out the nasty fluid and fell to the floor on my knees, clutching my stomach. _For a short stack, he's got some might, I'll say._

"Wh- What did I do...?" I sputtered. "You didn't change my sheets, you stupid little girl. That was the FIRST thing I mentioned. But what happens? I come back to the same nasty ass sheets. And the windows have streaks on them. Did your mother teach you how to do anything?"

I struggled to my feet. "Uhn... Ugh. Ouch. Um, yes and no, sir. Cleaning has never been one of my strong points..." I tried to straighten my posture, but hunger plus a kick to the stomach equals too much pain for me.

"Tch. Stupid women. Good thing that you're here and not a housewife. If I were your husband I don't know what I'd do with you. The house would be a pit of half completed projects." The Captain turned around and walked away.

 _Did he just say... If I were your... HUSBAND?!_ * I smiled weirdly to myself and blushed. * _Heh, heh, heh... Oh, that's so cute. If you were just half an inch taller, Levi. Half an inch. I don't care if you're 15 years older than me. Ah... You made my day just now, Captain._

I went back to my room to grab my sketchpad to take to dinner.

I spent my whole dinner hour drawing pictures of Levi in dresses and maid outfits.


	5. An Ocean Away

We had just finished training and I was sitting on a staircase spacing out.

Armin, Eren, and Bitch Face were sitting nearby talking. Armin was going off about his "Outside World" stuff again, with that smile full of hope and eyes wide with wonder and excitement.

So cute.

He started talking about the ocean.

"Armin, we know all this already. You've been talking about these theories since we were like five," Eren muttered. "But Eren, don't you wonder how all the bodies of water in the world connect? How do rivers never run out if they have no inland source?"

"Rivers connect either to an ocean or other large bodies of water," I chimed in from afar. "As it moves, its filtered and looses its salinity, and at its final destination it is fresh water. Either salty water comes inland or fresh water moves out. It depends on the terrain and location."

The trio just stared at me. Armin looked like he saw a ghost.  
"

How do you know that...?" he asked.

I shifted uncomfortably on the stone step. "Uh, well, I read it in a book I had found in my outhouse back home in a pile of junk we had. So... Yeah. It makes sense if you think about it. I bet the river near your hometown isn't salty, and it travels in from the west, and from old maps I've seen, the ocean is out west, so, um, that river connects to the ocean one way or another. It could be hundreds of miles though..."

"This book! Do you still have it?!"

This book had been the cause of an argument I had with my family a few years before I enlisted. Actually, it contributed to my decision of enlisting. My dad discovered I liked to read this book, full of information and maps and pictures, and he blamed me and my reading on why I didn't do anything right. "Why the hell are you loafing around reading? Where is that gonna get you in life, Kristin?" I simply replied, "I wanna be smart so I can be a doctor." My parents and sister laughed hysterically. "A doctor?" my mom said, "You're a girl! Girls don't have important jobs like that, silly!" "Yeah!" my dad chimed in as he lit a cigar, "Women get married and run the house, something I know you'll fail at. Find a man, take him to bed, get knocked up, and go from there!" I looked away in disgust. "Yeah, but Kristin probably won't find anyone. She can't get any guy to talk to her!" my sister laughed. I whipped my head around to look at my whore-bag sister, standing there in her dress with an abnormally low neckline exposing her lady- parts way too much. "Ya know what, Ingrid, you do way more with boys than talk to them, and everyone talks about how big of a SLUT you are! Why would I wanna be on your level, Ms. Mature and Sexually Active?!" Ingrid smirked at me. "Whatever. I'm getting prepared for finding a man who will support me. Good luck with your DOCTOR LIFE. Dumbass." My father threw my book away and my mother yelled at me. That's when I decided to enlist and show those low life's what I'm made of.

I came back to the conversation. I shook my head sorrowfully. "Nope. I don't have it anymore."  
Armin pouted. * _Oh my gosh, that is so cute,_ * I thought. "What a shame. Sounds like a good book." He turned back to his friends. Bitch Face glared at me.

 _Ugh, that damn woman, always glaring at me, what the hell is up with her? Where did Eren get this chick?_

I stood up and left quietly. From behind me I heard the faint words of, "You two shouldn't get involved with her. Something is up with her."

I flinched at these words. My eye and neck started twitching. _Oh, now she's done it... I'm really super pissed now... Ugh I could punch her, that freaking bitch. No, just keep walking. Go on. Move along. Kill her later, Kristin._

"HEY ALDERSFLUGEL!" It was the Captain now, who mysteriously appeared at the top of the stairs I was walking away from. I turned around and saluted. "Yes sir?" "In my office now. Help me with something."  
"Yes sir." I ran up the stairs after the Raven haired hotty. _Help you with something? Hmm... Ooh, I have an idea, lock the door, take your clothes off, and let me draw a nude portrait of you. I'll make two. One for me, one for you. Can we do multiple poses?_

I got lost in my fantasies and didn't think that maybe Levi just wanted me to do paperwork with him.


End file.
